Self-Pity feels good and can tell a lot about a person. However, the damage of self-pity is devastating. It cripples your mindset and your relationships with others. Not to mention it will hinder us to savor life to its fullest. So, let’s stop feeling sorry for ourselves. Here is the Ultimate Cure for Self-Pity.
The Ultimate Cure for Self-Pity
1. Behave in a manner that makes it hard to feel sorry for yourself
One cure for self-pity is to find behaviors that extinguish it. Sometimes it’s a process of try and error. Because the activity won’t suit everyone. So, try different things and see what suits you.
Volunteer to help a worthy cause
- It will take your mind off your problems for a while. Furthermore, you will feel good that you support someone else. It’s hard to feel sorry for yourself when you volunteer to teach a kid for free or help in a soup kitchen.
Perform a random act of kindness
- Helping someone in need can bring more meaning to your life. Like donating blood for sick people. Donating toys to poor kids. Or donating pet food to a local animal shelter.
Do something active
- Keeping your physique and mind active will distract you. Distracting you from your misfortune. Try a new sport, read a book, or learn a new hobby can help shift your attitude
2. Replace thoughts that encourage Self-Pity
Ask a kid what the best part about having divorced parents is and the majority will say “Having more Christmas presents!” Obviously, experiencing your parents going through a divorce can be life-changing. Nonetheless, kids rather concentrate on the small things that will give them joy. Like these kids, we must replace these negative thoughts.
What’s another way I could view my situation
- Here comes the “half full or half empty”-view in. If you are a “half-empty” person try the other view and ask yourself what the other might be thinking.
What advice would I give a friend?
- Often, it’s easier to give positive advice to a friend than to ourselves. You would never tell a friend: “Your life is pretty awful.” Instead, you would give them encouraging words: “You will figure it out!” So, take your words of wisdom to your own situation.
Can I get through this problem?
- Feeling hopeless often comes from a lack of confidence and the ability to solve problems. Therefore, review your old accomplishments. Which skills helped you and who helped you?. This will boost your confidence.
3. Exchange Self-Pity with gratitude
A lot of people who feel sorry for themselves are lacking gratitude. Numerous times, I listen to complaints that their life isn’t fair. Somehow most of them are about dating or their career. Some feel sorry for themselves because they get rejected by him/her. Others are impatient about their next career step. Instead of having a well-paying job, they complain about every small issue.
We who are living in modern countries have it so much better. Payable Health care, free education, free room for self-expression, and a stable political system are the thing we should be grateful for. Every self-pity damages these institutions people have fought and died for. My point is we don’t have it so hard, do we? Why do we concentrate on the small negative thoughts?
Therefore, practicing gratitude will lower the chance of drowning in self-pity.
Say what you’re grateful for
- Find one thing to be grateful for each morning after you wake up and in the night before you go to bed. Say them out loud. Because hearing it increases the feelings of gratitude.
Change the channel when you’re experiencing self-pity
- Switch immediately when you feel sorry for yourself. List people, experiences, or circumstances in life you can be thankful for.